My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Be still, my beating vagina.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
