is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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