i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
