Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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