we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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