I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
