Texts From Last Night

tessadidthat's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God. http://tfl.nu/6yhq
  Replies (2) Good night (566) Bad night (179) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors http://tfl.nu/kni1
  Replies (12) Good night (364) Bad night (1410) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones http://tfl.nu/t1ex
  Replies (7) Good night (2006) Bad night (485) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo? http://tfl.nu/h14o
  Replies (5) Good night (407) Bad night (773) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted http://tfl.nu/7fyh
  Replies (3) Good night (1036) Bad night (473) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off. http://tfl.nu/c8gb
  Replies (7) Good night (892) Bad night (280) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (450): View more from Quebec

  If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (450): If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him. http://tfl.nu/1adz
  Replies (12) Good night (1137) Bad night (397) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  She really is something else.

  (713): View more from Texas

  Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): She really is something else. (713): Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away. http://tfl.nu/3f56
  Replies (3) Good night (760) Bad night (347)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays. http://tfl.nu/7cee
  Replies (2) Good night (3292) Bad night (385) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild. http://tfl.nu/4xkg
  Replies (3) Good night (1057) Bad night (390) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?" http://tfl.nu/3rqz
  Replies (4) Good night (1419) Bad night (353)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom. http://tfl.nu/94fe
  Replies (6) Good night (623) Bad night (742) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.

  (239): View more from Florida

  that is the opposite of a normal text message.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult. (239): that is the opposite of a normal text message. http://tfl.nu/cufq
  Replies (6) Good night (1525) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete http://tfl.nu/uf35
  Replies (5) Good night (968) Bad night (436) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho. http://tfl.nu/pobq
  Replies (9) Good night (1539) Bad night (403) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time http://tfl.nu/xd6c
  Replies (7) Good night (1883) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out? http://tfl.nu/h2y5
  Replies (19) Good night (2152) Bad night (627) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot. http://tfl.nu/7dw2
  Replies (12) Good night (1932) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom? http://tfl.nu/95nz
  Replies (4) Good night (1656) Bad night (727) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well. http://tfl.nu/39wu
  Replies (20) Good night (7409) Bad night (554)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems http://tfl.nu/ja9t
  Replies (13) Good night (3372) Bad night (681) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me http://tfl.nu/k62l
  Replies (1) Good night (2182) Bad night (840) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): 130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!! http://tfl.nu/aorw
  Replies (3) Good night (2076) Bad night (502) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea. http://tfl.nu/ejed
  Replies (6) Good night (2378) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!

  (623): View more from Arizona

  It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection! (623): It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now... http://tfl.nu/u3ol
  Replies (6) Good night (2361) Bad night (646)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post http://tfl.nu/8lgm
  Replies (17) Good night (2404) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?

  (1-913): View more from Kansas

  I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink? (1-913): I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith. http://tfl.nu/78li
  Replies (8) Good night (1300) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record. http://tfl.nu/akbh
  Replies (19) Good night (1669) Bad night (651) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight. http://tfl.nu/gkvw
  Replies (3) Good night (1217) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week. http://tfl.nu/4lee
  Replies (5) Good night (2631) Bad night (892) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine http://tfl.nu/bvyx
  Replies (12) Good night (2088) Bad night (649) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly http://tfl.nu/pft1
  Replies (9) Good night (2978) Bad night (573) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki http://tfl.nu/rhok
  Replies (14) Good night (2796) Bad night (942) Order T-Shirt