Texts From Last Night · oligarchism's Favorites

oligarchism's Favorites Texts:

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(210): View more from Texas

I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.

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(210): I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you. http://tfl.nu/z9fg

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(949): View more from California

Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life

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(949): Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life http://tfl.nu/meh0

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(315): View more from New York

She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...

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(315): She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this... http://tfl.nu/h8y9

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(404): View more from Georgia

I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.

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(404): I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck. http://tfl.nu/f2m7

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(571): View more from Virginia

Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..

(703): View more from Virginia

this can't be going anywhere good

(571): View more from Virginia

nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\

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(571): Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah.. (703): this can't be going anywhere good (571): nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\ http://tfl.nu/4i13

Replies (196) Good night (1791) Bad night (26547)
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(512): View more from Texas

i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.

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(512): i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT. http://tfl.nu/zq8a

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(607): View more from New York

Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.

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(607): Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later. http://tfl.nu/om4f

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(720): View more from Colorado

You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.

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(720): You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger. http://tfl.nu/3qkv

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.

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(609): Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand. http://tfl.nu/nkg8

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(786): View more from Florida

I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.

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(786): I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction. http://tfl.nu/2rxz

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(440): View more from Ohio

Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks

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(440): Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks http://tfl.nu/nonu

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(240): View more from Maryland

woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.

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(240): woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again. http://tfl.nu/b9n0

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(212): View more from New York

yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"

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(212): yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer" http://tfl.nu/u5kx

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?

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(617): I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks? http://tfl.nu/26q7

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(720): View more from Colorado

I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was

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(720): I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was http://tfl.nu/iq7q

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.

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(412): I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra. http://tfl.nu/7xhn

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(225): View more from Louisiana

walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.

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(225): walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans. http://tfl.nu/3s10

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(518): View more from New York

4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.

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(518): 4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens. http://tfl.nu/m8yq

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(678): View more from Georgia

I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.

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(678): I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts. http://tfl.nu/4sqd

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(908): View more from New Jersey

There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.

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(908): There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life. http://tfl.nu/ab1p

Replies (87) Good night (7486) Bad night (1328) Order T-Shirt

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