DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
you guys were way drunker than both of me
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
Me, myself and I
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?