absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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