You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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