I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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