garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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