Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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