whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Just puked most of my soul out..
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