yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
