I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
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