we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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