BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Randomize