I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
