my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
She announced her abortion via fbk
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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