i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize