Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Randomize
