3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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