Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
