We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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