Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
