She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I AM VODKA MAN
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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