another moral hangover. fuck.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
