I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
My vagina is very pro this idea
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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