Farmville is her only friend.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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