We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize