What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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