I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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