New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
