You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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