Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
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i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize