so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
