Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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