So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Brb crying the tears of my youth
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
