I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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