I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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