The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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