In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Let's get the cat blown out
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
