Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize