There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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