all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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