i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
