Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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