so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
