His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize